


Nothing Compares to You

by monaboyd_archivist



Category: The Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-01-01
Updated: 2004-01-01
Packaged: 2018-04-11 18:14:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4446587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monaboyd_archivist/pseuds/monaboyd_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dom is oblivious whilst Billy suffers, but maybe the Scot likes it that way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothing Compares to You

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Shirasade: this story was originally archived at the Monaboyd.net Archive, which was closed in September 2014 due to software issues and a lack of new submissions for several years . To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in October 2014. I e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this author, please contact me using the e-mail address on the Monaboyd.net Archive collection profile.

  
**Title:** Nothing Compares to You  
**Author(s):** Ineke  
**Pairing:** Dom/Billy  
**Rating:** R for language and implied sexual relationship/violence.  
**Summary:** Billy Boyd suffers, but maybe he likes it that way. A few snapshots into his life with Dominic after ROTK.  
**Disclaimer:** The following is purely fictional matter. Actual timeframes, conversations and events are fabricated for my own convenience. I don’t know Dominic Monaghan or Billy Boyd, nor are they my property, and I’m not assuming anything about their private and sexual lives. Don't sue me, I'm so fucking broke.  
Sinead O'Connor lyrics adapted to my needs.  
   
____________________________________________________  
   
   
_If you were gone I could do whatever I want_  
Could see whomever I choose  
I could eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant  
But nothing  
I said nothing could take away these blues  
`Cause nothing compares  
   
N o t h i n g compares to  y o u  
   
 _______________________________________________________  
   
   
“I’ve grown out of this,” Billy says softly.  
It is unheard. The lights are dimmed, the laughter is loud, and the PlayStation is on maximum volume. The Stone Roses play softly in the background.  
“Fuuuck!” Elijah cries out, jamming the joystick violently with his thumb. “I’m so coming 12th now.” Dominic laughs, and takes a sip of his beer. His eyes are constantly fixed to the $15,000 plasma screen. The plasma screen, Billy thinks bitterly, that I bought for his arse. And now he won’t even look at me.  
“Sblom,” he says again, voice raised.  
“Mmm?”  
“I said I’ve grown out of this.”  
Dom’s eyes stay constantly fixed on Top Gear Overdrive. “Out of what, Bills?”  
Billy stares for a long time. He doesn’t know.  
\-----  
Breakfast is on the table when Billy wakes up. It’s a quarter of watermelon, Dom’s feeble attempt at feeding his friends on a summer day too blistering hot to move. Or maybe it’s left overs. Or maybe… it wasn’t intended for Billy at all.  
Billy takes it in his hand and analyses it. He always analyses things lately - himself, the watermelon… and Dom.  
“Thanks for breakfast,” he calls out.  
Nobody answers. He stares around the room waiting for a response. There is none. The clock reads 10.45 am, and fuck, they have a book signing at 11.  
   
“Thanks for waking me up,” he says again, to the empty room.  
\---------  
Billy remembers.  
   
_“I’ll count how long it takes,”_ Dom had said as he handed Billy a pair of goggles.  
Billy thought that game was stupid. It definitely was stupid, and it always had been. But Elijah grinned at him with that gappy child star smile and shoved the goggles onto his own forehead. Everyone had goggles by then.  
Dom sat impatiently on the edge of the boat.  
_“C’mon, Billy. Just do it.”_  
Elijah had been already underwater, and likewise with Sean.  
He remembers that deep New Zealand blue was reflecting off Elijah’s doe-like eyes. It had made Billy feel sick.  
Orlando had been counting loudly. He was up to about 45.  
Billy had wondered how long it would be before someone died. He remembers thinking it would be him.  
Elijah had emerged from the blue, panting.  
_“89,”_ Orlando had declared, laughing. _“That’s pathetic.”_  
Dom had stared at Billy. Billy remembers. He knew Dom was thinking Orlando’s words... But not about Elijah’s breathing.  
_“Jesus Christ, you’re a void,”_ Dom had said suddenly, and it wasn’t an insult. It was a simple observation. Billy knows this, because he can remember.  
   
Billy now suddenly wonders if a void can cry.  
\---------  
There’s a long silence when Billy sits down at the desk in Borders. He places himself very carefully between Viggo and Elijah. Dom says nothing, and Billy says nothing. The crowd says nothing. The silence is always worse than the fighting, Elijah had once said. Billy had thought nothing could be worse than Dom’s dismissal, his petty backstabbing. Billy now realises that the ring-bearer was right.  
A fan approaches.  
“Who shall I make it out to?” Dom asks, thumbing a well-worn page of The Hobbit. Billy watches him from the other side of the desk. There is a delicacy with which Dom handles his stardom. He’s polite, he’s quirky, and he gives this projection of total relaxation. Even his pen strokes are famous.  
Billy feels angry. He takes a poster of himself from a young girl, and starts scrawling. Conventions are always a Zen experience for Billy, and he knows that fame will never quite hit him in the way that it has hit Dom. He resents this a little.  He focuses, tries to concentrate on the writing, but loses himself in the flowing pen strokes of the B, the I, the L’s, and the Y.   
And now, he can remember.  
   
_Okay, so, let’s go around the circle,_ Elijah had said. Billy remembers.  
_How do we all feel about this project?_  
   
A shy blonde had been the first to open his mouth. He had a crooked gappy grin, upturned ears and a button nose. Everyone had always noticed Dominic’s nose.  
   
Billy just remembers the small twinkling eyes. Billy and Dom’s friendship had started as soon as those eyes had sparkled. It had always been from the very beginning.  
   
Billy remembers.  
   
_I’m Dom,_ he had said. Billy can still hear that British accent pounding in his ears. He can remember the exact tone. It had been deep, soft and rasping, yet held something so alive that it could have been the cry of a newborn child.  
_I’m Dom,_ he had said, and that had been all. That was Dominic in a nutshell. The ice was then broken, and Dom had in that moment melted Billy through flesh and soul.  
   
Billy can still remember. “Dom,” he says softly, and presses the cap back down onto his pen.  
\-------  
Billy stretches out face down on the sofa and enjoys the silence. The PlayStation is off, Elijah’s crooning CDs have gone home with him, and he’s all alone.  
Alone.  
And now… Billy’s scared what he’ll remember.  
He jumps at a sudden contact on his neck. But there is breathing, there is warmth and softness, and instantly Billy can feel Dom’s stubble, the tip of his tongue, his soft mouth. Dominic nuzzles down to the side of Billy’s cheek, and suddenly Billy isn’t sure whether he’s happy or depressed. So he turns his head to the side and makes what he hopes is a relatively normal face, which instead comes out as blank, dead and…void.  
Dom pulls back, and falls back onto his haunches. “Jesus, sweetie, what’s wrong?” he asks, genuinely interested. He sits at Billy’s feet, takes one in his hand, and rubs it methodically. Billy can’t remember the last time Dom was interested.  
“Nothing,” he says softly. There’s an adequate silence where nothing is said, so then Billy decides to fill it. “I mean…yeah. Just a shitty day. I want to go to sleep and forget that Tolkien ever existed. I’d like one day where I wasn’t just a hobbit, or just half of Billy AND Dom.”  
Another silence as Dom keeps rubbing, a little more pressure now.  
Billy sits up. “I’m sorry, Dom. I didn’t mean that to come out like that. But you know, we’re everywhere together. Everyone thinks we’re fucking…”  
“Once,” Dom says, standing and Billy can almost hear regret. He says nothing, and Dom exits slowly.  
Billy doesn’t want to remember. He knows he’ll remember that they were - that Dom had fucked him. Not that Dom didn’t do that everyday of Billy’s life. When Dom left him alone, when he ignored him, called him worthless, swore at him, hit him hard enough to bleed.  
He wonders if fan girls were jealous of the fact that he is fucked by Dominic Monaghan 24/7.

Thinking about it, he wouldn’t have it any other way.


End file.
